


Pieces of a House

by Emaisnialleraf



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Morgan Stark mentioned, Panic Attacks, Pepper Potts mentioned - Freeform, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Endgame, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Tony Stark, Steve Rogers Has PTSD, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Writing doodle, i just can't kill tony, natasha romanov mentioned, not edited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-22 13:53:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22717069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emaisnialleraf/pseuds/Emaisnialleraf
Summary: Post-Endgame; PTSD can hit anyone.Even a super soldier.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Kudos: 29





	Pieces of a House

**Author's Note:**

> Just a small writing doodle I came across in my google docs; there are like twenty more pages, but I think just this snippet is a little more appropriate to post.

He sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands, struggling to calm the painful tugs against the blonde strands of his scalp. It wasn’t anything near the agony of his mind, but it still caused a pain he knew he shouldn’t be creating. 

Ever since they arrived at the cabin he had been struggling to leave the room, watching the sun rise and fall everyday without taking a step outside. His love had been in and out constantly, disappearing for hours only to return with food and water when deemed necessary. Sometimes before the middle of the night he would be dragged into the bathroom, scrubbed underneath the spray of water that pelted against his back. Sometimes warm and sometimes hot, but never cold. 

Never cold. 

Sometimes he was dragged down the hall into the playroom, avoiding toys at his feet before being sat in the corner of a couch more comfortable than his bed. He could lay on it without nightmares, constant buzzing across the table as random cartoons splattered themselves across the TV screen. Sometimes he heard laughter, innocent cries around the house and he wished it would come from him. 

But the world wasn’t innocent. 

It wasn’t full of love and light anymore, it was smothered in terror and suffering and there was nothing he could do to change it. He just wanted to go home. 

Today was a day of mistakes. 

The water was too cold and froze his lungs, causing him to throw up across the floor without any control. The tiles were frozen to ice when he was sat down and before he knew it he was tucked behind the toilet until a metal hand forced him out and into bedsheets. The silence was lonely and he had no sounds in the background, no laughter and it led him to dangerously quick thinking. The kind of thinking that spread panic and he screamed with his hands blocking out the silence until his face was in a chest and his tears were wiped away with the blankets. Food was also wrong. He needed something that didn’t smell like smoke, something that didn’t have steam rising from all angles, but they didn’t understand that and the gauntlet was flashing before his eyes. Stones were lingering around his head and he sobbed and sobbed until it was taken away. 

There was a soft voice in his ear, gentle as it spoke to him, creating promises that he’d help him. It shushed him, arms held him and lips pressed against his temple until he fell apart and begged for Nat. He hadn’t seen her in so long and she would always help things make more sense. 

When he begged for Tony things were smoother. The familiar hand was in his, holding tightly as a small blue light flashed in his view. Hugs were warm and he felt put together if just for a moment. The scarred tissue was gone, his left eye was clear and he stared into the brown eyes for what felt like hours until a motherly voice called and he had to go back down the stairs. 

Steve never went down the stairs. It’s a future, there are too many obstacles down there and just the idea of losing someone drove him mad.

**Author's Note:**

> It's a little everywhere, but I am about to go to work for the day so when I come back I might edit some of this; maybe add a bit more. 
> 
> Be sure to subscribe if you want to see any changes or anything added on!


End file.
